Attention seeking muppet Stephen Ireland has once again made the headlines after an inflammatory interview with a French magazine.

The follicly challenged 24-year old with an endless supply of grandmothers launched an astonishing attack on the Irish international team, his home country and Cork.

“I won’t come back,” the Donald Pleasance look-alike told So Foot magazine when asked about an international return.

“I feel nothing for the national team. I don’t feel at all guilty when they lose and when they win I never say ‘oh dear, I could have been there’.

“Even if Ireland had qualified for the World Cup I wouldn’t have gone. People are calling for me to return, but I only ever played five games guys!

“International soccer doesn’t interest me. Going away for three days to play in Andorra – I’ve got better things to do.

“Also, when you’re Irish you know you’ll never win the World Cup. Even when I played for the youth teams, I got fed up at having to go away.

“Everyone else was from Dublin and I came from Cork. I had to get the train on my own, pay for a taxi, there was no hotel, no food. The organisation was amateurish."

When asked about Giovanni Trapattoni, he said, “I’ve never seen anyone so arrogant. I met him once. He was taking calls every two minutes and made me hang around for 15 minutes in his office.

“In the end, he said, ‘if you want to play then come, if not, it’s no problem’. He did that mainly so the press would leave him in peace."

Ireland added, “Foreign coaches, they’re no good. Mancini never liked me. He’s doing everything wrong. He got rid of everyone at the club – even the cook left.

“The family club I spent nine years with exists no more. What happens when Mancini goes? He takes his 50 recruits with him. Also, since he’s been there City matches are incredibly dull.”

When asked his opinion about the Irish economic crisis (why?) he concluded that, “Ireland is reaping what it sowed.”

The owner of a €175,000 fish tank added that, “we built blocks of flats just for the sake of it and now there’s no one inside them.

"It cost huge amounts of money and nobody is in a position to pay. But I don’t care about Ireland. I don’t know if I’ll go back one day. Live in Cork? I might as well shoot myself. I prefer Los Angeles.”