JOE’s Premier League Five-A-Side

From the weekend’s Premier League action, we’ve selected our five-a-side team. Think of it as a team of the week for lazy people.

As any close follower of Garth Crook’s selections on the BBC will tell you, picking a team of the week is not all fun and games. The hours spent toiling over passing stats, effectiveness in attacking third and distance covered are all wasted as people just want to see how many of their favourite side made the cut.

We decided to make our, and your, lives easier by just picking a five-a-side team from the weekend action. Think of it as the ‘team of the week’ equivalent of Twenty20 cricket or Twitter; short, to the point, and hopefully a bit more interesting.

With only five spots up for grabs, competition is fierce so please don’t be shy in telling us who we left out and who shouldn’t even have darkened the door of our mythical community centre.

Goalkeeper: Julio Cesar (QPR)

Being the last line of defence at QPR is a thankless task. But Julio Cesar proved he was more than up to it on Saturday as he repeatedly denied Spurs the breakthrough.

A brilliant double save from Defoe and then Adebayor was the highlight but the Brazilian was vital to QPR getting a point and if he can keep that level of a performance up he might, just might, keep his club up in the process.

Defender: Patrice Evra (Man Utd)

The winning goal will probably go down as Nemanja Vidic’s but the Frenchman was arguably United’s best player against Liverpool yesterday. A constant threat going forward, he has damped down talk of his demise and he ensured Stewart Downing had zero impact on Sunday’s game. Okay, that's damning with very, very faint praise but Evra looks to have found his form again, and he has now added a goal threat to his game.

Midfield: Frank Lampard (Chelsea)

Another player whose demise has been greatly exaggerated. Lampard was superb on Saturday against Stoke. Four shots, four on target, one goal via a penalty. He was top passer too with 52 out of 64 completed and if Chelsea do decide to let him go, he has added another few thousand to his next wage packet with his performances of late.

Midfield: James McClean (Sunderland)

Sunderland surprised us all at the weekend by playing well and scoring three goals. Central to that unusual turn of events was our own James McClean. The Black Cats midfield were all in top form but we make no apology for choosing our man instead of Adam Johnson, David Vaughan, Seb Larsson and Stephane Sessegnon.

His goal was scrappy but his general play was excellent as he hugged the touchline and tormented the Hammers defence. A very welcome return to form with some massive games coming up.

Striker: Romelu Lukaku (West Brom)

His team may have gone down in the end but it wasn’t because of the big fella up front. The Baggies striker scored twice, could have had two more and at 19 he might finally be shaping up to be the new Drogba that he was touted as when he first arrived at Chelsea.

West Brom want to keep him for another year and we can’t blame them. Virtually unplayable when in the mood, the Belgian is going to be a superstar for somebody one day.