Finally we can get some ME time
Love is in the air and all that, but only for those out there who already have someone. For the rest of us normal folk however, we have to have a look at finding a way to fill the evening when everyone else will be out drinking their wine and eating their fancy chocolates. But not us, we’ve got much better plans, and we realise that there are a few really good reasons for being single on February 14th.
It’s financially sound practice
There’s really no way of getting around the issue of forking over cash for Valentine’s Day if you’re in a relationship or seeing someone, so having all that spare dosh to spend on yourself is obviously much better. You can get yourself a brand new game for your console and play online until four in the morning, and no one can give out to you.
You can eat whatever you want
Let’s be honest, we all prefer a good solid pizza or a few chips to fancy food that we have to pay over the odds for in a jam-packed restaurant on Valentine’s Day, so if you’re staying at home on your own you won’t need to eat snails or frogs legs, you can have a tripple-whammy mega burger instead.
You can hang around with your mates
Who’s more sound than your mates? No one, that’s who. Maybe you can finally settle the debate as to who is the best FIFA player in the group…
Why not hit the gym?
There is probably no better time to be getting your pump on than this Friday evening. You won’t have to wait around for the machines, there’s not going to be a queue for the benches or the squat rack, and you’ll get the whole thing done in record time.
All the single ladies, all the single ladies
It may surprise you, but you’re probably not alone when it comes to being alone on Valentine’s Day, and if you head out, there will be a few single ladies (or lads, your choice) that will also be looking for love. That means for an average shmoe like JOE, standards may have been sufficiently lowered for us to get a lovely twirl on the dancefloor.
You can nerd up on the form books ahead of the weekend’s football
This is how JOE spends every Friday night, and we’ve never been wrong about a football prediction ever*. This way when you’re watching the match the next day, you can hit out terms like ‘transitional play’ and ‘key attack zones’ and you might actually know what you’re talking about.
You won’t have to go and see any chick flicks
Instead, you can head to the cinema, not have to share your drink or popcorn and watch Super-Mega-Action 56: The Explosioning at the cinema instead, starring Chuck Norris as Liam Neeson. The only other people there will be other class lads like yourself too, so you can high five everyone.
You can eat as much ice cream and no one is around to judge you
Ice cream is delicious, we all know that, and when no one is around, then you can eat as much of it as you want. Of course, there’s one place you should definitely go if you want to stick to the principles of tip number one and save a bit of dosh at the same time, then head to our mates at Centra, where you can grab a Magnum Kisses ice-cream for just 1c with any other purchase. Liquid value, Jurassic Park.
The offer is valid on Valentine’s Day only and each store has a limited amount of availability. See Centra.ie for terms and conditions.
LISTEN: You Must Be Jokin’ with Aideen McQueen – Faith healers, Coolock craic and Gigging as Gaeilge
