Monday, July 13th
In all fairness, how happy does Conor McGregor look here? The champ had us up at stupid o’clock in the early hours of Sunday morning but gave everything he had before inevitably succumbing to the…
(*ruffles notes*)
…hang on, he won the fu**ing thing? How come nobody told us?
We’re not known for following the fortunes of Ireland’s favourite argumentarian, except that we are, and Monday saw us mop up the nice little viral stories we didn’t get in Sunday’s deluge of McGregornation.
Like this. Oh, and the fact that he’s going to be a coach on The Ultimate Fighter.
Other stuff happened on Monday too, we’re sure of it…
Oh yes, the return of Nidgey; Liam Cunningham telling Conan O’Brien to go f**k himself; Manchester United finally, FINALLY buying a central midfield with not one but scheriously impressive schignings.
Tuesday, July 14th
Liverpool fans raised their heads and gave a resounding ‘nyeh’ to the news that Raheem Sterling had become the most expensive English footballer in the history of soccerball.
Sterling joined Manchester City while his former team-mates were dancing around Bangkok look some sort of Scouse version of the Harlem Globetrotters.
Jordan Henderson with a rabona assist, I say: https://t.co/LNMAPHt6C6
— Paddy Power (@paddypower) July 14, 2015
One man who wasn’t particularly pleased about the whole thing was Jason McAteer, who thinks just because Sterling is young and English he’s automatically heading down the road marked Scott Sinclair Way and then turning left on to Jack Rodwell Avenue.
(God, that was clunky – Ed.)
We also had the world’s greatest Walter White doppelganger in Croker, while these Irish J1 students were cheering so loudly for Conor McGregor that they got fined $125 by the Chicago police.
The new Irish rugby jersey was revealed and there was a story about Coppers. We could tell you about the story, we really could, but (and you’ll forgive our cockiness) the fact that it’s based on Coppers means you’re going to click into it anyway. So why bother?
Wednesday, July 15th
As Harper Lee’s ‘Go Set A Watchman’ was released to mixed (and often baffled) reviews, our Carl Kinsella lamented how a Junior Cert hero in Atticus Finch was being turned into a racist.
Noel Gallagher, meanwhile, made bits of a heckler in Cork and this fella doing a dad dance – complete with The Robot – made us obscenely happy. That’s no exaggeration.
Finally, we had the invention of boxer shorts that can hide an erection.
You’re welcome for this.
Thursday, July 16th
The day of ‘stay the hell away from Julia.’ The day of Jamie Carragher’s little portent of doom. Most importantly, the day where the words Grand and Anal and Cocks ceased to have all meaning for us.
Frankly, everything else paled into insignificance after that.
Friday, July 18th
When you’ve reached the age of 57 and you’re taking your first trip on an airplane, you’re bound to get a bit emotional.
So it was for this Irish dad, heading over to Liverpool to see his daughter. A nice moment for Newry man Patsy Carville. Vegas next?
Elsewhere, Fabian Delph turned from traitor to hero to traitor again by turning his back on Aston Villa for Manchester City’s filthy lucre and Conán Doherty on the SportsJOE desk was inconsolable. Just desolate, the poor Villa maniac.
We’ll be honest, with McGregor v Mendes a distant memory, the Premier League still in silly season and Longitude just getting started, we spent most of the day in the JOE hammock sipping caipirinhas.
LISTEN: You Must Be Jokin’ with Aideen McQueen – Faith healers, Coolock craic and Gigging as Gaeilge
