Easily the most popular golf tournament around, Irish golf fans will be glued to the US Masters all weekend and here are some of the things you can expect to hear them shouting at the telly.
1. ‘Sure we have an Amen Corner down at our own golf club. It starts on the first hole and finishes on the 18th!’
Wahey!
2. ‘Has anyone ever put bacon and cabbage on the menu at the Champions Dinner?’
Not that we know of, but reigning Champion Adam Scott apparently put on meatfest this year.
3. ‘Not that bollix Monty again.’
We give it ten minutes before he delivers his first reference to his time as Ryder Cup captain. It won’t be his last.
4. ‘There’s a lad in a Kerry GAA jersey.’
There’s always one…
There he is again…
And again…
5. ‘Yer man Nick Faldo is the spit of Harrison Ford.’
The resemblance is uncanny…
6. ‘Is that Butch Harmon lad staring at me or what?’
Apart from when he’s not feeling the Mae West, of course…
7. ‘If some fan shouts “Get in the Hole” one more time they’ll be getting a kick in the hole from me.’
At least it’s better than ‘Mashed Potatoes’.
8. ‘I should really go to bed’
There are going to be a lot of tired heads on Monday morning.
9. ‘Ah you’d miss Tiger all the same’.
He’s missing this weekend at the Masters and a lot of people will wonder if he’ll ever come back close to the player he was.
10. ‘What the hell is that Poulter fella wearing?’
In fairness, he’s got better since the Arsenal jersey days.
11. ‘Dustin Johnson? He won’t win. Sure he spends more time in the sand than David Hasselhoff.’
We may have poached that one straight from Happy Gilmore. Thanks Shooter…
12. ‘Do they let women play in that place yet?’
Yes, actually. But only since 2012.
13. ‘Why, why, why did I back Sergio?’
Every year you promise you won’t and every year…
14. ‘It looks deadly but sure don’t they paint the grass to make it look greener’
This oft-heard rumour seems to be just that, but maybe turn down the contrast on the flatscreen so you don’t get blinded by the display of lush lawns and blooming flowers.
15. ‘I’d love a go around there’
Everyone with even a passing interest in golf would but being asked to play by one of the only 300 members of Augusta National is very, very slim. If you here of a tee time going, we’re free.
16. ‘Id say Bubba Watson would be a decent hurler’
Hard to argue…
17. ‘I miss Myles Dungan’
Broadcasting from what looked like a hot press in the bowels of RTE, Myles was a welcome relief from the BBC coverage back in the day.
18. ‘Don’t f*ck it up from here Rory’
What we hope to be shouting as he rounds the turn on Sunday. Remember this?
