Here’s how Roy Keane’s first press conference as Ireland assistant went, with all the best quotes

The most famous assistant in world football meets the press this afternoon. Here’s what he had to say.

While Martin O’Neill has charmed the Irish football community with his wit in his press appearances to date, today his assistant, Roy Keane, held his first solo press conference in Malahide. Our man Conor Heneghan is in the room (with his phone on silent) and he’ll be sending us updates while those of us back at JOE Towers are glued to the TV to keep an eye on the Corkman’s every utterance. Here's the best of what Roy had to say, as it happened... 3:03: And that's all folks. We saw some of Keane's humour, some of his steel, and a lot of optimism for the future. As he would no doubt say himself, we need to see what happens on the pitch, but as press conferences go, he didn't disappoint. Roll on Friday.

Roy: "Ultimately we're here to qualify. That's the remit, let's try and qualify. If we do let's not just think that's great." — conor heneghan (@conorheneghan1) November 13, 2013

  3:02: 'Success is measured by qualification. If we manage to do that, kick on, let's have an impact. That's the aim, let's see how it goes.' 3:01: 'We'll do our best to get him [Stephen Ireland] back involved.' 3:00 Question on Ferguson book's criticisms dodged by Keane. 'Today is not the day for that'

Roy: "There's nothing to tame, I'm not like some sort of animal." — conor heneghan (@conorheneghan1) November 13, 2013

  2:57: 'We've got some really good young players, put some demands on them. You've got to push players. It's great. There's a way of getting that message across, treat people with respect. I've got to step back and let Martin run the show. 2:54: Did you ever consider yourself a candidate for the manager's job? 'Didn't think too much about it. Didn't see myself as a candidate. 2:52: On a question on the 'bad cop, bad bad cop' line 'You obviously don't know Martin that well. Compared to him I'm Mother Theresa' 2:51: I've missed having the bit of craic, football chats. Really enjoyed it. 2:49: 'The hotel's been lovely, the food been excellent, the training pitch is lovely, no potholes. Major progress' Big laughs from the assembled hacks. 2:48: Did management come too soon? No, right opportunity came at Sunderland, Can't be too clever about what you're planning. 2:46: Denies that he told Ray Houghton there were players in the squad better than him. 'Maybe Ray had a few pints'. Goes on to say some may have had potential to be very good. 2:45: 'There's only so much talking you can do, you have to go out and do the business'.

Roy: Wasn't one bone in my body that thought that this wasn't right for me — conor heneghan (@conorheneghan1) November 13, 2013

  2:43: 'I would have been crazy to turn this opportunity down'.

Roy: Despite criticism of me as a manager I think I did OK as a manager. Obviously I could have done better. — conor heneghan (@conorheneghan1) November 13, 2013

  2:41:  There's loads I want to learn. You're always learning. If you think you have all the answers you're heading for trouble. 2:39: 'Weighed up the fact I will be an assistant. Will be more hands-on. Martin will pivk the team and the tactics and hopefully he will take my views on board.' 2:38 Asked if he spoke to any of the players he played with in the squad before taking the job 'No, that's a ridiculous question. None of their business.' 2:37: 'We're certainly not a pal's act and hopefully this will be a good experience for me. Some might see me as a threat or a troublemaker but hopefully Martin sees something in me that has a lot to offer.' 2:36: 'Trapattoni did a very good job.' 2:35: 'This is a full commitment, not a part time role. Watch loads of matches, that will be a part of the job and it won't be a hassle for me, I enjoy watching matches. 2:34:  Question about leaving for a Premier League job produces a Keane glare 'It's irrelevant'. 2:33:  'If we don't get result, we know what's coming. It would have had to have been a manager of Martin's calibre. We're certainly not buddies'. 2:32: 'If I had any issues with the FAI I wouldn't be sitting here'. 2.31:  'I don't settle for second best and I won't apologise for that'. 2.30:  Great start from Roy. 'I've spent years trying to please everybody and believe me it's a waste of time'. 2:25: And, true to his word, Conor is following the protocol..

Just arrived for Keano's press conference. If my phone is gonna go off it's only going off once #originaljoke https://t.co/nJBUgduhb5 — conor heneghan (@conorheneghan1) November 13, 2013