The club can’t handle Flo Rida’s awful white ensemble

A man who has somehow managed to redefine the term 'one-hit wonder' to 'first-single-off-each-album' wonder for himself, we made sure Flo Rida didn't escape our wrath this week.

By Emmet Purcell

Everyone’s famous ring-tone rapper  Tramar Dillard, better known as Flo Rida (as he’s from Florida, his name being perhaps the most inventive move in his career yet) is perhaps a one-man microcosm of today’s hip hop genre – he’s had five multi-platinum singles yet has never had a platinum album. Hence the term ‘ring-tone rapper’.

If there’s one thing we can say about Flo Rida, he does have an ingenious knack for creating instant one-month-long massive hits, which are nearly always the first single of his filler-filled pop-rap CD. One facet where the Floridian always tends to slip up, however, is his bizarre fashion sense, or more accurately, his penchant for removing his top. Much like Dressed in the Dark alumni and fellow rapper Rick Ross, Flo Rida has no excuse for ever removing his top in public, ever.

Someone find this man his vest

Appearing at the Y100 Jingle Ball 2010 Show in Sunrise, Florida last week, Flo Rida channelled his Saturday Night Fever-esque inner Tony Manero by turning up in an all-white ensemble, with a white backwards baseball cap, white jacket, unforgiving white vest, white jeans and a white belt. Topping it all off was a classy ‘Poe Boy’ gold necklace, a very expensive advertisement for the Poe Boy Entertainment stable where the rapper is signed.

After a few minutes, however, it was all too much for poor Flo and like his recent smash ‘Club Can’t Handle Me’, the rapper’s white wifebeater could no longer handle his bulging waistline, so the star decided to continue his performance topless and shameless before his beaming hometown crowd.

Let's be honest, Flo Rida’s ‘music’ is bad enough and his facial topiary the worst since Craig David without the guy having to provide further ammunition, yet it’s too hard to ignore when he happens to look like your favourite rapper’s eccentric uncle that wants to be ‘down with the kids’.

Flo Rida, a word of advice: you’re 30 years old, you’re leaving absolutely no legacy with your disposable bubblegum pop rap and nobody wants to see you with your shirt off. And only 76 people are fans of your beard on Facebook - because it looks crap.