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You’re dad if you do and your dad if you don’t!
The summer is well and truly here and while that might mean sunshine and lollipops to a lot of people, think of the Irish dad out there struggling with his lot.
Barbecue Expectations
He might not be a very good cook and there’s probably a chance that he’d burn water if asked to make something, but there is a lot of expectation on dad to be the barbecue equivalent of Jamie Oliver. Everything is expected to be perfect and plentiful.
Gardening Guru
Sun’s out, lawnmowers out! Okay, that might not be the actual saying, but that is the expectation. Mr Jones from three doors down has fountains in the garden,
The pressure to create a hidden oasis is real and even if you have injured yourself before with a watering can, you had better create Eden.
Sporting Prowess
You may not have been very sporty in the past, but if your kids are into it, you have to take part and practice with them.
Yes, the father and son next door might be amazing at keepie-uppies, but how many dads are willing to embarrass themselves in public all in the name of participation and support?
Or maybe you could just support them from the stand, like this guy…
Fitness
If you’re going to try sport with your kids, you are going to need a degree of fitness. Your kids don’t want you falling down flat on your face in the park when someone has the temerity to throw a ball over your head and not directly into your hands.
Convincing the little ones that it’s late
It’s coming up to 9.15pm and your little kids are tired, but because it’s still bright out, they think you are committing an act of high treason by asking them to go to bed.
‘But daddy, it’s still bright out!’
Fatigue
Just because the kids are going to bed late, it doesn’t mean they are sleeping in late either! The same kids you have to drag out of the bed for school are now blackbelt experts at getting up at sunrise!
Repairs
Kids play with things and kids break things. That’s just a fact of life and it’s your job to be on 24/7 repairs duty. Whether it be a puncture repair or putting back on a doll’s head, it’s all expected of you and it had better be done with minimum fuss!
Personal driver and taxi service
Remember you may be needed at any time to head off somewhere in the car. It could be to go to the shops, it could be to bring the little man down to the park, whatever the reason, you better be prepared to drive and lots of it too.
Someone once said ‘Driving gives you independence’. Does it now?
Working Holiday
You might be jetting off to a nice sunny place, but that doesn’t mean you are on holiday. Your waking hours will be spent minding the little ones, protecting them from the pool, the sun and whatever else you have decided is a potentially perilous activity.
You will need a holiday after it.
Being a real life ATM
It’s the summer and one thing which will require you to dip into the coffers is the arrival of the ice-cream van on your street.
As soon as its nursery rhyme tunes are blasting into your eardrums you can hear the stampede of tiny feet coming in your direction inevitably leading to the demand of money and quickly!
First-aid expert
Little kids will be accumulating bumps and bruises throughout the summer and you will be needed to respond to emergency situations such as your little girl barely scraping her knee off the ground.
You can barely see the scratch, but your little princess is wailing like she’s just been stung by a bee the size of an elephant. Calming them down is the first bit and then choosing the right plaster is the next bit.
Woe betide any father who attempts to put on a Mickey Mouse plaster when your kid is clearly demanding something from Frozen.
The SMA Careline is available 24/7 for mums (and dads) to get any help or support they need.
ZRI342a/08/16
LISTEN: You Must Be Jokin’ with Aideen McQueen – Faith healers, Coolock craic and Gigging as Gaeilge
