It’s the thought that counts when buying a Christmas present… it’s a pity we didn’t think about it more.
We know you can relate, gents. You’re into the home straight in the lead up to Christmas Day and all you’ve bought is a selection box for yourself and the Home Alone box set, which you were also hoping to keep.
Panic stations have been hit. You need to buy gifts and you need them quick… so you buy the following terrible presents:
Awful perfume
“No mum, I didn’t know perfume came in litre bottles either.”
We’ve all done this; equated quantity with perfume quality when buying a Christmas gift.
This is a mistake which is usually made by the young, or in JOE’s case, those in their mid-20’s. The woman in your life will probably still pretend she loves it… trust us, she doesn’t.
At least it will make for a good “how bad does this smell” conversation starter.
Novelty clothes
“Remember that novelty jumper you got your sister for Christmas last year?”
“Yes.”
“Remember her wearing it after Christmas Day?”
“No.”
Novelty items of clothing are the joke that keeps on getting less funny. And they’re rarely funny to begin with.
Foot spa
JOE envisages a post apocalyptic Earth where all that is left are mountains of unused foot spas which were bought by well meaning men who were looking to get all their presents bought with the least stress possible.
At the bottom of Mount Foot Spa will be Lake Terrible Perfume…
Foot spas aren’t bad inventions by any means, but very few people actually want to receive one as a present.
A present you wanted for yourself
Learn from our mistakes… you’re girlfriend does not, we repeat not, want a pair of size 10 Puma King football boots.
Nothing at all
The “I left it behind me” excuse has been used by every single one of us.
For your own sake, don’t find yourself on this list next year … Get those Christmas presents sorted here and now with a Maldron Hotels & Partner Hotels voucher.
A romantic hotel getaway with your girlfriend; a spa day for your mum and a dinner for the mother in law are all wonderful presents. Plus you don’t have to leave the sofa to buy these vouchers which can be used at any one of the 17 Maldron & Partner locations throughout the country.
LISTEN: You Must Be Jokin’ with Aideen McQueen – Faith healers, Coolock craic and Gigging as Gaeilge