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Life

28th Aug 2017

Some Irish people might be demisexual when it comes to dating and they don’t even know

The term first came to light in 2008.

JOE

It’s a dating term that you might not be familiar with but could apply to you.

Irish teenage discos are notorious for shifting and the majority of the Irish youth growing up will have got their first kiss there.

Shifting someone you don’t know in a nightclub may seem strange when you’re 13/14 but it’s something that can stay with you into adulthood.

However, what if you’ve never been one to randomly hook up with people on nights out and even though your friends do it, the thought of it just doesn’t appeal to you.

Well, you may be demisexual.

According to the Independent, “Demisexuals only fancy someone once they’ve got to know them – they need to feel a strong emotional connection to feel sexual attraction.”

The term, demisexual, first came about in 2008 when it featured on a website called the Asexual Visibility and Education Network. 

This website is really good for online forums and people can log on there and talk about their different experiences of what it is like to be demisexual.

Demisexuality comes under asexuality but it is unclear how many people in Ireland actually consider themselves to be demisexual.

One member told that site that:

“Part of the problem is that I’ve only recently (in the last month or so?) figured out exactly what my sexuality could be described as.

“For at least 1.5, maybe 2 years, I’ve been wondering if I was bisexual or asexual, but neither of those felt right. I’ve been in a nearly-5-year-long heterosexual relationship, so part of me is conflicted with coming out at all.

“My biggest worry is that my close friends will not understand my demisexuality, or that they will think that it’s ‘normal’ to ‘not want to have sex with everyone you meet’ (which, to my knowledge, is different than demisexuality).”

If you need extra knowledge on demisexuality, paying a visit to the Asexual Visibility and Education Network will be extremely informative.

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