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Life

23rd May 2014

Look at your car, then look at this car, and then decide if this is the best ad you’ve ever read

Do you want the keys to "this taxed, NCT’d and fully serviced head turner?"

Tony Cuddihy

Do you want the keys to “this taxed, NCT’d and fully serviced head turner?”

Adverts.ie plays host to the best attempt to rid oneself of a Volcano Red 1.4 Volkswagen Golf you will read on the information superhighway today.

Or any other day.

It’s magnificent and makes perfect reading while you pretend to do some work. Here goes…

“Hello Ladies and Gentlemen. Look at your car, now look at mine, now back at yours, now back to mine. Sadly, your car isn’t like mine. But if you picked up the phone and dialled my number, you could perhaps one day bask in the glory that is my Volkswagen Golf.

“Close your eyes, now open them, where are you? You’re in the drivers seat of a Volcano Red 1.4 Volkswagen Golf. Now what’s in your hand? It’s the keys to this taxed, NCT’d and fully serviced head turner.

“Now look at your car, back at mine. You’re suddenly using Cruise Control along the open road, your right hand in control of all 4 Electric Windows, you’re wearing your Ray Bans and using the Heated Electric Wing Mirrors to confirm that yes, EVERYBODY is checking out this impressive vehicle rolling on silver Alloy Wheels. Your Automatic Rear View Mirror will dim the jealous glare from on lookers.

“Look at your car, back at mine, look at your car, you’re feeling sad, look at mine, you’re feeling excited. The possibilities are endless, 4 seats for you to entertain friends, a large boot for perhaps a golfing trip, coffee cup holders, glovebox and door pockets for storing tickets to that thing you love, CD player and surround sound for listening to inspirational and energy boosting music as you drive towards that thing you love…

“What’s that? It’s the Automatic Wipers. Never used. Why you ask, well that’s simple – when you’re in this car the weather is always good.

“You know what to do. Pick up the phone, dial my number. What if this is the car of your dreams? What if this car brings you immeasurable luck? And you pass up on this opportunity… How could you go on? How could you live with yourself. Imagine seeing someone else sitting in the driver’s seat of your new car. I don’t want that to happen. And neither do you. So pick up the phone.

“Look at your car, now look at mine. Or should I be saying your car?

“If I don’t answer, its probably because I’m just away from the phone for that split second or working so please leave a voicemail and I will call you back.”

Magnificent. Here, once again, is the link if you’re won over by our friend’s entrepreneurial spirit.

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