This person surely has to be the world's fussiest, most difficult Airbnb host
And you thought Monica Geller was bad...
Look, we like things tidy. There's nothing worse than a messy kitchen and absolutely no excuse for not replacing the toilet roll, but this Airbnb host brings pettiness to a whole new level.
Comedian Martin Pilgrim has shared the feedback he received from the owner of an Airbnb he recently stayed in.
To say the person in question needs to sit down with a few (dozen) cocktails and a Parks And Recreation box-set is an understatement.
This is what they wrote to Martin, after they'd deposited his £345 in their bank account, of course.
The note read:
"Martin, as you will now have seen I have not recommended you to other hosts but I have kept my reasons for this in the private feedback section. I have come to learn that one of the key requirements of both host an (sic) guest is communication.
"Aside from contacting me prior to your arrival asking if it was okay to have flyers delivered you communicated nothing to me. I do think you might have let me know that you were going to leave a day early! Aside from this you did not respect my home.
"Every day on returning home I would have to push the dining chair in, return the jars when you had had coffee or tea. Obviously on one occasion you had spilt coffee but instead of using kitchen roll or a cloth you used the oven cloth to clean the spillage which I then had to wash.
"On having a bath or shower you left the shower curtain outside of the bath and the shower head turned to the wall.
"In addition to what I have said previously which may seem trivial, I was indeed quite angry that you thought it was okay to leave the pillows and cushions on the bedroom floor for the entirety of you (sic) stay. That the curtains and blinds also stay closed throughout your stay I will not comment on but I think that the room would have benefitted from having the window opened to air the room.
"I had left a message for you on Monday past about ensuring you turned the kitchen light off. On Tuesday night I returned home to find both the hall and toilet light on and yesterday on arriving home you had left the main bedroom light on!
"All the above led to me feeling very uncomfortable during your stay in my (home)."
Never let me stay in your Airbnb. I will move your chairs and jars slightly and all I'll give you in return is hundreds of pounds. pic.twitter.com/NQvi1oBXmU
— Martin Pilgrim (@MartinPilgrim1) September 13, 2017