Pic: Newry man puts Seat Inca van up for sale with hilarious ad on Gumtree

She ain’t much to look at, but the owner of this van deserves a good price for her for the quality of this Gumtree ad alone.

Trying to find a buyer for a 1997 year old Seat Inca van whose best days are clearly behind it is a hard sell, but what this particular van lacks in aesthetic appeal and functionality, it makes up for its flaws with its character and if vans could talk, this one could tell a thousand entertaining stories of its remarkable 17 years of existence to date. The Gumtree ad is quite long and detailed and we strongly suggest that you read it in full here, but we have included a few snippets below for your enjoyment (try and ignore some of the grammatical errors). “I bought it off a foreign lad and I was driving away at it until I had to let it lie low for a couple of days after a bit of a row outside the Relic one night and it's lay there since. To put a long story short, some lad took the hump when my friend shifted his girlfriend. Shit went down and the van hada be kept outa the road. It's all good now so I wouldn't be worried if you’re cruising about the town.” “Straight diesel in the book but but a Turbo Diesel engine fitted so she's a good bit faster than a straight diesel. I raced a 130 brake golf one time and he couldn't get away. In saying that now, I'd be a brave good pilot so maybe that had something to do with it, but still, hanging on to a 130 brake golf is no mean feat, it shows ya the vans fit for it with the right man behind the wheel. “There's a cat airbrushed on the bonnet and he looks like he's cutting through it with his claws. It could be handy if you come up to a checkpoint with no tax or a bitta red in her, it might be enough to scare the cop from stopping ya. It's pretty well done. “I'll need £250 if you want alloys, beacon and wind deflectors. £200 quid without them. No offers. It will drive away if you can jump it but I'd advise a trailor. I don't know what miles is on it cuz it's a digital clock and the battery is flat. I'm pretty sure it's under 100,000 but I'm not certain. Tax book and all. It will pass MOT with a small bit of work. I'd be interested in a swap if you have something interesting. No shite phones unless they have 250quid of credit in them. Quads, scramblers or mountain bikes maybe. Text between 9-6 or text/phone after 6. Thanks for looking." It might need a lick of paint, a pretty thorough valeting and quite a lot of functioning parts to make it roadworthy, but you won’t find a van with more personality, more character and more life experience than this particular beauty and it would be a shame if it ends up being parked up for good. For £250, it's a bargain. If you’re interested, you can find the ad and contact the owner here. You know what to do. Hat-tip to Eamon Doran for sending this one our way