The future is now… introducing the bus that is powered entirely by poo
Start clocking your bowel movements now guys, poo could be the new petrol…
Yesterday, the UK’s first poo-bus was put into service by the government and will be responsible for (having the) runs between Bristol and Bath. *JOE laughs crazily at our own joke*
The bus is powered entirely on human faeces and food waste in the form of biomethane gas and a full tank of fuel will bring the bus around 200 miles.
However, it must be added that it is not a simple matter of pressing your cheeks to the fuel cap and thinking of flushing meadows.
To fill the tank requires five people’s annual ‘deposits’ but if you’re badly stuck, one person’s annual disposals can bring the bus 37 miles.
So we would advise that if the bus does run out of fuel on your journey, try and refrain from attempting to refill it to be the hero of the day.
The likelihood is that your best efforts will only give the bus another 20 yards of range.
On the technical side of things, the ‘poo-bus’, or ‘bio-bus’ as it is more commonly called, creates about 30% less carbon monoxide compared to the equivalent diesel engine.
Plus, if it was brought to Ireland, it could probably render the tax on septic tanks obsolete.
This is our plea to the Irish government, get us a poo bus. The time is now, sh*t or get off the potty…*
*We apologise profusely for this truly awful joke…