What’s the most manly vehicle in the history of cinema?
This question has divided JOE towers into a hotbed of tension and controversial opinions.
Honestly, there hasn’t been this much animosity in the office since the correct crisps in a sandwich massacre of 2010.
So, without prolonging the argument any longer, here are our picks.
XXX: 1967 Pontiac GTO
The XXX stickers make the Pontiac look like a mobile adult movie store, but nonetheless, it’s hard to deny the masculinity of this vehicle.
If it were a man, it would be: Jeremy Clarkson. It blows a lot of hot air through its many exhausts and would be considered manly by a bygone generation.
An Education: 1958 Bristol 405 Sedan
This isn’t a manly car, this is a gentlemanly car. The Bristol 405 Sedan is the car we all imagine driving if we ever marry into royalty. A true beauty which stood out in the Nick Hornby penned flick.
If it were a man, it would be: Colin Firth. This vehicle is manly in the most elegant sense of the word.
The A Team: 1983 GMC Van G-15
If you are going to survive as soldiers of fortune on the run from the government, then you need a sturdy manly vehicle. The GMC van is just that.
If it were a man, it would be: Sean O’Brien. The GMC is a bulky bruiser that’s built to last. (If we found an actual Tullow Tank, it would have definitely made the list).
Menace II Society: 1991 Mustang GT Convertible
The Mustang Convertible is as street as can be. It’s better than most, but doesn’t look out of place mixing with the crew.
If it were a man, it would be: Jay Z. A true street icon, that never forgot its roots.
Knight Rider: 1982 Customized Pontiac Trans Am
What’s more manly than a car that could help you with the morning crossword. This car isn’t just powerful and cool, it’s intelligent too.
If it were a man, it would be: Andrea Pirlo. Simply quick, stylish and intelligent.
Casino Royale: 2007 Aston Martin DBS V12
It’s looks sharp, it’s got plenty underneath the hood and it was a Bond car. It doesn’t get much more manly than this.
If it was a man, it would be: Conor McGregor. Style, class and more than a little dangerous.
The Dark Knight: 2005 Customized “Lamborghini Tank”
Only one vehicle could be at the top of this list and it’s the Lamborghini Tank from the Dark Knight.
Fast, powerful, agile and absolutely gorgeous. This beast is the very definition of a manly vehicle.
If it were a man, it would be: Jonah Lomu. As agile as it is powerful, this beauty will blow you away if you don’t take it seriously.
But you don’t always need a hot set of wheels to show you’re more Steve than Stephanie McQueen. To jump into the fast lane of manliness, all it takes is a visit to your local McDonald’s and three magically manly words: Quarter Pounder Deluxe. It’s serious man-food.
LISTEN: You Must Be Jokin’ with Aideen McQueen – Faith healers, Coolock craic and Gigging as Gaeilge
