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21st Nov 2016

Zayn Malik and Niall Horan take part in a handshake that saves 2016

Nooruddean Choudry

Peace in our time.

2016, eh? What a bastard. What an absolute fucker of a year. I’ve lost count at the number of times I’ve angrily shook my fist at the calendar in disgust and focused anger at that arbitrary period of time. Whenever I see the number 20 closely followed by a 16, I get so angry I want to spit. Yes – spit.

Image result for 2016

But what’s this? It seems that 2*16 may actually have a very late but hugely significant redeeming feature after all. Just when you thought this latest orbit around the sun was piloted by Beelzebub himself, a startling moment of heart-swelling iridescence breaks through the clouds and gives us a rainbow.

Alas, all it took was one brief handshake to restore our brittle faith in humanity and heal our collective wounds.

There have been important instances of manual intercourse in the past. Who can forget the digital three-way between Harry Truman, Winston Churchill and Joe Stalin following the surrender of Nazi Germany in 1945?

Harry Truman, Winston Churchill and Joseph Stalin

More recently, the Bill Clinton brokered fist-entanglement between Yitzhak Rabin and Yasser Arafat in 1993 was seen as a significant step towards a two-state solution in the Middle East. That didn’t work out quite as well as hoped…

Yitzhak Rabin and Yasser Arafat

But all that pales in comparison to what happened on November 20, 2016, at the Microsoft Theater in Los Angeles. There was a coming together of sweaty palms so significant and earth-shattering that you probably felt the tremors where you lay.

Zayn Malik, that heaving colossus of the modern cultural landscape, was present at the American Music Awards on Sunday evening to pick up the well-deserved New Artist Of The Year gong. Zayn is of course an esteemed alum of One Direction.

Image result for one direction

Also present from the teeny-pop collective – currently on musical hiatus – was Niall Horan, or ‘The Irish one’. Despite the vast expanse of the impressive arena, these two friends-turned-foes were destined to come together like planets…or magnets (…or whatever metaphor makes the most sense).

Perhaps due to a longing desire to ‘make good’, and resolve their various creative and personal differences, or maybe due of the awkwardness of the situation, the pair engaged in a handshake of monumental and possibly lasting significance.

Image result for morrissey marr

Imagine if Morrissey and Johnny Marr appeared on stage together, or John Lennon and Paul McCartney did the same (although it would have to be a hologram of Lennon, who is currently jamming in heaven with Prince and David Bowie according to Facebook…)

Anyway, here is the magical moment when Malik and Horan made contact. Brace yourselves.

https://twitter.com/llhn1d/status/800596331567792128

As you can imagine, the reaction amongst onlookers and fans was something to behold…

https://twitter.com/1DTheNation/status/800527513218850816

https://twitter.com/daggertattooH/status/800627018928824320

https://twitter.com/Real_Amy_Adams/status/800606635009908736

***Update: They may have said ‘Hi’ too***

https://twitter.com/OfficialWith1D/status/800520383971540993

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