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24th Apr 2014

This has to be the best religious-themed junior hurling match report you’ll ever see

Well Holy God, this is just tremendous.

Conor Heneghan

Well Holy God, this is just tremendous.

Religious references have always been intrinsically associated with the GAA, from the John 3:7 banner often seen in Hill 16 and in other GAA grounds to exclamations such as ‘Jaysus ref’ and ‘Christ, how did you put that wide?’ regularly heard in games up and down the country.

We don’t think we’ve seen as many GAA-related religious references in the one place as a match report on a junior hurling clash between Erin go Bragh and Cuala in Dublin recently, however, with the author inspired to include them after a dramatic late winner was scored by substitute Moses Wanjigo, a Kenyan who only took up the game three years ago.

Prepare to be dazzled by this piece of work by David Kennedy, taken from the Erin Go Bragh GAA Club website:

Junior Hurling: Cuala v Erin Go Bragh

Cuala 3-11

Erin Go Bragh 3-13

Chapter 1 Revelations:

Half time Commandments had been dished out to the sons of Carpenterstown alongside the loaves and fishes of insight and direction. Nonetheless a powerful hunger to win remained. 2 points down with the sun about to set upon the Emmet.  Moses you’re going in…. don’t worry we’re not expecting a MIRACLE’ (The Word according to Karl).

Already there were signs of hope when all should have been lost….. King Kenny had pointed from on high and St Colin of Camross had miraculously risen from the dead a number of times. Surely a third miracle would be too much to ask? A long high ball breaks in the box…..Moses plants his stick firmly and….PARTS THE RED SEA!!! (of Cuala Jerseys)…. a ball flies…. then lies….nestled miraculously, within a net not unlike that of the fishermen of Gallilee. Moses’ followers rejoice as eternal salvation is achieved (from the post match tyranny of Johnson). The people of Hazelbury busy themselves in preparation for the visit of St Colmcille and Sunday’s Day of Reckoning…

What can you say to even try and follow that apart from praise be unto David for this literary bounty he has given us. Magnificent.

Hat-tip to Erin Go Bragh PRO Karl Scanlon for sending this one our way