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Life

24th Jun 2017

An American supermarket ‘invents’ the sausage roll and gives it a pretty stupid name

Sacrilege.

Rich Cooper

We love a sausage roll, we do.

The sausage roll is part of the Irish lifeblood, which is no doubt swimming with grease and pastry, but that’s not the point.

It’s the killer of hangovers, the breaker of hungers, the soother of tastebuds. Don’t fuck with perfection.

We may share a cultural history with our American friends, but the sausage roll has never really taken off over in States.

However, one canny supermarket has taken it upon themselves to bring the sausage roll to the American masses. Trader Joe’s have introduced ‘Puff Dogs’, an all-beef hotdog “swaddled in a perfectly flaky-when-cooked puff pastry.”

Trader Joe’s have introduced ‘Puff Dogs’, an all-beef hotdog “swaddled in a perfectly flaky-when-cooked puff pastry.”

“We don’t mean to hot dog here,” Trader Joe’s writes, “but this marriage of beefy and buttery is pretty genius.”

You can’t help but agree, it is pretty genius, but we’ve known that for centuries.

Fair enough, our sausage rolls are typically made from pork, but you can’t go around claiming the genius for wrapping a sausage in puff pastry and sticking it in the oven.

Of course, people had opinions about this ‘discovery’.

We dread the day they discover coddle.