It's the most wonderful time of the year.
The Eurovision Song Contest kicks off tonight with the first semi-final taking place deep in the heart of Lisbon.
But forget about those hopefuls, they're all dorks anyway. What about little old you?
Let's pretend you're taking part in the competition this year. Let's pretend you can sing, dance and entertain like your life depended on it.
Would you have what it takes to win this utterly meaningless and heavily politicised competition?
Let's find out, champ.
