A terrifying but brilliant experience.
Driving lessons. We all have to do them. No matter how boring and tedious they may seem, they just have to be done. 12 of them to be exact. And there is nothing more nerve-wracking than your very first one.
You are about to get into a vehicle that has the potential to do untold damage to you and everyone around you. No pressure! Here is just a few of the frantic thoughts that swim around your head during your very first time driving a car.
1. Okay what? I have to drive this thing? You’re joking. Nope. I can’t. No way.
2. Right, I’ve seen my mam turn on the car thousands of times. You just put the keys in and turn. Done. This is actually pretty easy. Now what?
3. I’m actually driving. On an actual road. This is terrifying. Why is everyone else going so fast? Can’t we all just go at a steady, slow pace? Why is your man behind me beeping? What have I done? Oh God, this is the worst thing I have ever done.
4) The instructor keeps using words I don’t understand. Clutch? What the hell is a clutch? This is a disaster. And now I’ve just realised that I’ve had my headlights on for the entire time even though it’s 1pm in July. Perfect. And are roundabouts always this complicated? Why are they even a thing?
5) Now this is better. A nice, open road. Going at a safe speed, nobody beeping at you. Nobody putting unnecessary pressure on you, driving inches behind your car. This is everything I hoped it would be. I could definitely get used to this. You know what, cancel the next 11 lessons. I’m ready for my test now. This is the life.
6) And I’ve cut out. Bollocks. And I can’t get the car started again. Bollocks. I hate this. I never want to drive again. Cancel the next 11, because I will never get into the car again. And the beeping has started again. Why is everyone so horrible? I am going to go crazy…
7) It’s time to reverse around a corner, for some ridiculous reason. Literally, when will I ever do this? Reversing around a corner. Isn’t this just extremely dangerous? Why am I doing this?!
8) Okay, my mind has changed again. Driving is deadly. Mistakes aside, this is a seriously fun thing to do. And I can only imagine how fun this is going to be without having a large man breathing down my neck, judging every single move I make.
9) One down, 11 more to go. Hopefully I cut out less than 13 times during lesson number two.
