It's Friday.
It's
Bank Holiday Friday, no less.
You're probably out there in the world, doing cool social things.
But if you aren't doing that and would rather stay in and watch a movie, let's see what's available on the 'ol television on Friday, 29 July...
The Green Hornet – Comedy Central – 7.45pm
Don't bother.
Circle of Friends – Virgin Media One – 9pm
Minnie Driver and Chris O'Donnell find love in 1950s Dublin.
Heat – RTÉ 2 – 9pm
Simply put; the best crime film ever made.
Pacino. De Niro. Kilmer. An incredible heist scene. The loudest gunplay onscreen maybe ever. A classic, dammit!
Armageddon – ITV4 – 9pm
Not quite a classic but perfectly acceptable Michael Bay nonsense.
Kingsman: The Golden Circle – E4 – 9pm
The second one.
Equilibrium – Turner Classic Movies – 9pm
American Psycho aside, before the Caped Crusader came calling, Christian Bale was really clawing his way around Hollywood for a while, looking for something substantial to make his name.
One such project that he likely wouldn't bother with now is 2002's flawed yet somewhat fascinating Equilibrium, which finds Bale as a lawman – or 'cleric' – in a dystopian future world that has outlawed emotion itself.
But what happens when Bale's stoic and dedicated cleric begins to experience that most forbidden of feelings? Sean Bean, Taye Diggs and Emily Watson make up the supporting cast.
Mission: Impossible – Fallout – Film4 – 9pm
Our main pick this evening.
You know how the Mission: Impossible films just started getting better with each new huge blockbuster entry?
Fallout, the most recent such adventure, is the best case for this theory. Ethan Hunt finds himself embroiled in another dangerous global thriller in which the fate of the world is at stake. Just another day at the office.
Exceptional action sequences, terrific pacing and a fantastic cast – Henry Cavill nearly steals the entire show – drive this irresistible juggernaut but you're here for Tom Cruise and his ludicrous commitment and stunt-work. And boy, does he ever deliver.
The Way West – TG4 – 10.05pm
TG4. Friday. Western. You know the score.
The Last Right – RTÉ One – 10.35pm
Michiel Huisman (the second guy who played Daario Naharis on Game of Thrones) plays a man who, to his surprise, is left in the company of a corpse of a person he never knew. It's a comedy, somehow.
Legion – Legend / The Horror Channel – 10.45pm
A film I always confuse with the equally forgettable Priest. This is about angels at war or something.
Charlie's Angels – Channel 4 – 11.05pm
The 2019 reboot with Kristen Stewart that died at the box office.
Absolute Power – Turner Classic Movies – 11.15pm
A run-of-the-mill Clint Eastwood thriller on Turner Classic Movies, you say?
Tomorrowland: A World Beyond – BBC One – 11.40pm
Not a documentary about the famous dance music festival but rather a too-cute-for-its-own-good science fiction romp with George Clooney, Britt Robertson and Hugh Laurie.
Escape From New York – Film4 – 11.55pm
Kurt Russell's ice-cool Snake Plissken has a presidential mission in John Carpenter's classic sci-fi thriller.
Girl With a Pearl Earring – RTÉ One – 12.40am
Scarlett Johansson catches a painter's eye in this tempestuous indie drama from 2003.
The Florida Project – Channel 4 – 1.15am
Tough and touching drama about a six-year-old girl's life as a resident of a cheap motel near Disney World. Willem Dafoe was nominated for the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor for this, and he really should have won.
They Live – Film4 – 1.55am
John Carpenter again, this time directing Roddy Piper as a man who is here to chew bubble gum and kick ass. And he's all out of bubble gum.
