Tuesday.
It's not quite Monday.
It's not yet Wednesday.
It is Tuesday.
Here's the most interesting movies available to you via the medium of television on Tuesday, 28 September...
Risen – Film4 – 6.55pm
Biblical drama with Joseph Fiennes in which a Roman solider searches for the body of Christ in the wake of his resurrection.
Escape From LA – Turner Classic Movies / TCM – 9pm
Kurt Russell is back as Snake Plissken in a sequel that is genuinely laughable when compared to the original, or most other films to be entirely honest.
Jack Reacher: Never Go Back – Film4 – 9pm
Tom Cruise reprises the role of the famous rogue military man in a sequel that is nowhere near as enjoyable as the first one but you could do a lot worse at 9pm of a Tuesday evening.
Under Siege – ITV4 – 9pm
Ah yes, the film in which Steven Seagal briefly convinced us all that he could be the new Bruce Willis or something.
Under Siege, if you've not seen it, is basically 'Die Hard on a boat' and it's a fairly strong 90s throwback action film.
Tommy Lee Jones, Gary Busey and Colm Meaney offer some great scenery-chewing bad guy support, too.
Seven – TCM – 11.10pm
Or, if you're a purist, Se7en.
Our main pick for the evening is one of the all-time great crime thrillers. Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman play two very different detectives trying to track down an inventive and brutal serial killer in an unnamed city where it always rains.
As noted in the headline up top, Se7en boasts an incredible twist – well, more than one, really – and if you've somehow gone this long without seeing it, we highly recommend you stay up late tonight for it.
You may not sleep too well afterwards, though.
Scarface – ITV4 – 11.15pm
Al Pacino would like to introduce you to his little friend.
Dark Encounter – Film4 – 11.20pm
Sci-fi mystery thriller in which a small town is hit with strange happenings following the disappearance of an eight-year-old girl.
Demolition – Film4 – 1.15am
Jake Gyllenhaal literally tears his life apart in a well-meaning comedy-drama that would probably be our lead pick tonight if it wasn't on at a quarter past one in the morning. Record it, maybe?
